see me

I had a friend in high school that would shout at people if they didn't pay attention to her, "What am I a piece of glass and you see right through me?" She certainly earned some attention that way. Well I can't say I feel like a piece of glass, but it sure isn't easy to find people who actually see you. To help me with my quest to find someone who actually sees me, I've decided to write a personal ad. I have no desire to date but a friend or two with benefits would be perfect. ;)

Woman, the size of most 8 year olds, seeks man to get horizontal with

Who could resist this one! After 10 years of marriage, this fabulously tiny woman comes with suitcases full of emotional baggage. And what fun you'll have playing with her two bratty kids. They love to throw temper tantrums and will make you feel completely uncomfortable by talking endlessly about their genitalia. But that's not all! This lady runs her own business that is so much fun she never leaves. Try talking to her during the day. It's a hoot! Better get this one while she's still on the rebound.